Embrace the Suck-

In this episode, we delve into the crucial elements of navigating challenging situations swiftly: Mindset and Resilience. Discover the profound meanings behind each and learn actionable insights on making mindset shifts and intentional actions. Uncover how these tools empower you to take control and effectively maneuver through even the toughest circumstances.

Episode Highlights & Transcript

Embrace the Suck – Mindset and Resilience

Mindset:

1. Abundance vs. Scarcity Mindset:

• Embrace abundance, believe there’s more space and resources.
• Create opportunities rather than waiting for them.

1. Positive vs. Negative Mindset:

• Focus on solutions, spend more time seeking solutions than finding problems.
• Optimism assumes everything will work out; positivity considers how we respond.

1. Growth vs. Fixed Mindset:

• Cultivate a learning mindset (growth) rather than attributing success solely to inherent ability (fixed).
• Ask different questions, adopt different assumptions, metaphors, and perspectives.

Resilience:

1. Emphasize the Positive:

• Resilience involves a variety of skills and coping mechanisms.
• Zig Ziggler’s reminder: Failure is an event, not a person.

1. Gratitude and Perspective:

• Lower your gratitude bar, appreciate small blessings.
• Develop a positive outlook to put unexpected challenges in proper perspective.

1. Finding Meaning:

• Instead of asking “Why me?” ask “Why not me?”
• Tally gains from challenging experiences, find meaning in suffering.

1. Sense of Humor:

• Even dark humor can play a role in resilience.
• Avoid letting avoidance become your default coping strategy.

1. Taking Small Actions:

• Choose a challenging situation, apply newfound resilience.
• Take small actions, notice their impact, and repeat the process.

Conclusion:

• Life is an experimental journey of actions adding up to change and growth.
• Vince Lombardi’s wisdom: The greatest accomplishment is rising again after falling.

Additional Resources:

• Join the Life Isn’t Always Easy Facebook group for more insights and the Embrace the Suck Four Day Course.
• Visit lifesandwayseasy.com or kimcoastac.com for more resources and a free resilience ebook.

Remember, each small action adds up to significant change and growth. Embrace the challenges and keep moving forward!

Transcript

“So, why embrace the suck? Why would you want to hold on to it? Because in any event, that has the potential to break us, it also holds the same opportunity to build us and shape us. Craptastic situations come with just as much potential for growth as it does to destroy us. In order to transform these opportunities, there are some skills that we must each hold—resilience, flexibility, openness, strength, and a mindset that will provide these skills with the environment to thrive. But before all of those even matter, we need to identify why does this situation even suck to me? Okay, so what makes the situation suck? I know you’re probably thinking that is a stupid question, but have you ever really actually put some deep thought into it and really dissected circumstances and thought about why it sucks?

So think about this. What does the event have that makes it so bad? What makes it seem so unpleasant? Does it interfere with our goals? Does it hurt us financially? Does it interfere with our relationships or does it violate our values? Does it question our skills? Will it take away from time that results in how we schedule our lives? Some things will just hit a little bit harder too, especially if they are compromising your core values. For example, one of my key values is integrity, is something that is coming at me, make me negotiate my integrity. If it does, it will definitely knock me back further than something that isn’t attacking one of my core values.

Something else is how it affects someone that is in my life that I love. If it hurts them, it’s definitely going to suck more for me. Or will it take more time out of my already busy days? Is it short term or long term requiring me to adjust my schedule or my lifestyle? My great grandmother used to say life is nothing but a bunch of problems. Once you get one figured out, another one will come around right behind it. So you can hear that and take one or two things from it. It can seem incredibly depressing or empowering, but you get to decide. You may have also heard the saying that life is 1% of what happens to you and 99% of how you respond to it. It is so true.

If we can combine those two ideas that another problem is on the horizon and how we react to it will matter, then we are able to build a defense around anything that comes our way. Think about it. If you are empowered and know that there is another problem coming around the corner and have a mindset that is needed to respond, you will be more resilient. No, I am not talking about you being happy that you just lost your job or that you found out that you have a chronic illness. That would be ridiculous, but you don’t know the opportunities that await the relationships that you have yet to develop.

And if you let bad news or a crappy job consume you, I promise you there will be many more missed opportunities. I never in a million years thought that I would be grateful my child was diagnosed with a chronic illness or that I have seen the pain of bullying and what it could cause another child to do. But I chose not to live there and to use our experiences to help others. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not suggesting that you need to channel your challenges into helping everyone else. That works for me, but you can use your challenges to remind yourself of what you can overcome. Everything in life we have a choice.

Remember that having awareness of your mindset, understanding your values, and recognizing your current skills are key in navigating through any craptastic situation. Think of the old term phrase is the glass half empty or is it half full? In this episode, I’m wanting to chat with you about two powerhouses that drive our bounce back and can help us recover from anything life throws at you: Mindset and Resilience. Let’s discuss Mindset.

First, there are three main categories for mindset, and I’m going to highly recommend that you pause right here and get your pins out. Or better yet, you can go to lifeisntalwayseasy.com and click on the show notes for the transcript. Okay, here we go. Your mindset is simply a set of attitudes that you hold. There are three categories that we are going to be discussing today. Each of those has two contradictory concepts within them: abundance versus scarcity, positive versus negative, and growth versus fixed.

To adopt an abundance mindset over a scarcity mindset, okay, this just really excites me. Don’t be surprised to see me do a whole episode just on these mindset shifts. Okay, but I digressed. Again, I just get so excited. Okay, so to adopt an abundance mindset over a scarcity mindset, you have to start with the assumption that there is more space and more resources than what you might see at first. You don’t wait for things to happen. You make things happen. You find a way to create more opportunities. You can expand solutions to be inclusive of your ideas as well as others. So rather than fighting turf wars, you create a larger space. Rather than fighting for resources, you just find more.

When you operate from a scarcity mentality, the problem is that you get defensive or offensive and find yourself competing unnecessarily. While you can spend your energy competing, you could also spend it in creating more alternatives and expanding opportunities and finding abundance. Let me give you an example for anybody that doesn’t know. In my former life, I had a high-end photography studio. I got into professional photography at a terrible time because after I jumped in, the digital photography scene blew up and everyone that owned a camera was a photographer. And the photographers, well, let’s just say the industry is ruthless when it comes to helping each other. It was like everyone had a different trade secret and couldn’t be kind to one another because it was all the competition and everybody was fighting over clients.

I took a different approach. I trained moms to take better pictures of their kids and trying to build relationships with every photographer that I had the opportunity to meet. I had the mindset that if we helped each other, then this would raise the industry expectations, even training those that were less skilled than I in both craft and in business. And to be quite honest with you, it worked. The relationships I developed with other photographers gave me some really cool opportunities like photographing the Astros. And when I created a senior photography event for the class of 2020, years after I closed my studio, the photographers came. They all donated time, and above all, they came together in a network. I was successful. I didn’t compete or fight for business at all. I thought outside of the box and created opportunities and my clients dug it. I didn’t care what other photographers were doing because I wasn’t competing.

Okay, next up is adopting a positive mindset over a negative mindset. This does not mean that you don’t find flaws or critical thinking skills about ideas. It just means that you find a way to spend more time seeking solutions than finding problems. With a positive mindset, you keep moving forward and don’t fall into the cycle of getting stuck where you let your own pessimism keep you down. The dictionary definition of optimism is hopefulness and confidence about the future or the success of something, while positivity is the practice of being or tendency to be positive or optimistic in attitude.

Optimism happens inside the head

, and positivity is what you project. Optimism is a personality trait and a more natural instinct and something that you exhibit. While positive thinking is a choice that you make with conscious effort. Optimism makes an assumption about the world. It assumes that everything is going to work out all right in the end. On the other hand, positive thinking makes no exceptions of how the external world will be. Instead, it considers how we will respond to external circumstances.

Optimism can have its fault. Optimists may be accused of being blind to the negative reports or dismissive obstacles. Their assessments of the future or their capabilities may seem naive or even haphazard. Sometimes it may look like they don’t have a really good touch with reality. Although someone who chooses positive thinking is clear-eyed about obstacles and even serious problems. They don’t ignore the challenges, yet they work towards solutions. They do not ignore or minimize the problems, but they move forward with the purposeful belief that a solution can be found.

Oh, all right, we’re going to touch a little bit more on that again, but I just really wanted you to have the good, solid basics. The last subject in mindset that we’re going to cover is fixed and growth mindset. So if you have a fixed mindset, you give credit to ability and not learning. You think people are what they are. They’re either naturally good at what they do or they don’t have it at all. Think of it like a basketball star. They are naturally going to make it into the NBA not because they work their butt off every day to improve their skills, but because they just have a gift.

A growth mindset is a learning mindset. It is a belief that you can improve at whatever you do through the right training, dedication, and grit. And yes, you can teach an old dog new tricks. If you are trying to adopt a growth mindset, here are some great tips on how to do so. Ask yourself a different set of Questions. Asking yourself how you can make the most of the situation or how you can thrive instead of survive is a very different set of questions than asking yourself, Why me? What’s the use in trying? You can adopt a different set of assumptions. For example, rather than assuming that there’s not enough, assume that there is more than enough and you just need to find it.

Keep in mind that you should always test your assumptions, but adopting a different set of assumptions can help you reach different conclusions you might not have otherwise explored. Adopt a different set of metaphors. For example, rather than seeing life as a tragedy, you could see life as a drama complete with drama and comedy. And then lastly, wear a different hat. Similar to the metaphor, you can change your mindset by changing your metaphorical hat that you put on. Okay, I loved me some Walt Disney and he summed up abundance, positive, and growth mindsets in one simple quote around here, however, we don’t look backward for very long. We keep moving forward, opening up new doors and doing new things because we are curious and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.

This quote I first became familiar with when it popped up at the end of my favorite Disney movie, Meet the Robinsons, which is really a perfect portrayal of all three of these mindsets. Okay, that was a lot to process. Now, moving from mindset to resilience itself, this is the second big nugget that I am going to give you in this episode. Gene Chatsky describes resilience as not a single skill. It is a variety of skills and coping mechanisms to bounce back from bumps in all the roads as well as failures. You should focus on emphasizing the positive. I also feel inclined to tell you that Zig Ziggler couldn’t have been more right when he reminded us that failure is an event and not a person. Let’s keep that at the front of our mind as we realize that we tend to give more weight to our problems rather than solutions.

Okay, let me say a little bit louder to everybody in the back. We tend to give more weight to our problems rather than their solutions. And that negativity can tempt you to throw in the towel and give up on pursuing something that you really want. All of this can lead to unhealthy coping strategies like binging or compulsive behaviors or emotional eating. And really, who needs that? You can become more resilient in many ways, including developing a positive outlook by lowering your gratitude bar. Sure, you might be thinking, Did I just ask you to become ungrateful? No, I just told you to change your standards of gratitude. Sure, big milestones are worthy of celebration, but so are the little things in life.

The smell of a Sunday breakfast, feeling the sun on your face, a playful pet snuggling with your little it is easy to overlook all of life’s little blessings, but making the effort is worth it. Intentional gratitude trains your brain to give less stock in the negative and more power to the positive. A positive outlook puts things in proper perspective when life throws us unexpected curveballs. In order to become resilient, optimism isn’t nearly enough. The late Vice Admiral James Stockdale survived over seven years of imprisonment and torture in the Vietnam War. When he was asked what role optimism played in his survival, he said, the optimists, they did not make it. Wow. Think about that. The optimists did not survive when they were imprisoned. When it comes to resilience, optimism only works in conjunction with a healthy reality check, even if sometimes it’s brutal.

Remember we discussed earlier? Optimism can sometimes be blind to reality. Could dialing down some of your optimism help you see a reality you’re missing? Sometimes it just sucks. It reminds me of the meme that I will post in the show notes so you can see a picture of it, and it’s a dog sitting in a kitchen with the house burning down around him and he is like, Everything’s fine, everything’s fine, everything’s fine. And even though the house is just catching on flames more and more. And it is just a perfect illustration of this concept. So you will need to find meaning. Resilient people find a way to make meaning out of their suffering. In his book Man’s Search for Meaning, Holocaust survivor and author Victor E. Frankl said, we must never forget that we may also find meaning in life, even when confronted with a hopeless situation, when facing a fate that cannot be changed.

A Holocaust survivor that well, didn’t expect to survive right and is just surrounded with so much pain and so much death is telling us that we need to find meaning in all situations, no matter how horrific they may seem. Instead of asking, Why me? How about asking, Why not me? Instead of focusing on what you just lost from an ordeal, tally what you may have gained from the experience. I use the same thought process when I am faced with a big whammy. I mean, isn’t it ignorant or arrogant to think that I am somehow exempt or too big for these things to happen to me? What makes me so special that I don’t know. Life can bypass this challenge when I’m concerned.

So hopefully, you are still with me and I haven’t lost you yet or your brain hasn’t exploded. Okay, the last tip that I’m going to give you right now is to develop a sense of humor. After researching Holocaust survivors, former President of the Boston Psychoanalytical

Society and Institute, Maurice Vanderpool concluded that a sense of humor, even a dark sense of humor plays a big role in resilience. Yes, even dark, twisted humor can provide stress relief and perspective to challenging circumstances. Facing adversity is demanding. Sometimes we just want to curl up in a ball and hide. There is nothing wrong with a brief pity party, especially if there’s potential for cake at this party. Seriously, it’s okay to let the feeling of overwhelm overwhelm you.

The trick is not letting avoidance become your default coping strategy. Feel your feelings, but don’t take up residence and live there. Seriously, give yourself a time limit for the visit. Let the next day be a new day. The best example that I really have for this is my son has multiple specialists that he visits, and there are some doctor’s appointments that I know have a potential to come with more life-altering news. I do my best to schedule these appointments at the end of the day. Now, this completely contradicts anything that I would teach a client or exercise myself when it comes to time management. Typically, you would like to schedule a doctor’s appointment the very beginning of the day, the first appointment during the day, or the first appointment after lunch.

Why? Because they are not running late at this time and you don’t have to worry about feeling as caught up or catching up or as rushed. Okay, but the reason why I schedule certain appointments later in the afternoon is because that gives me less time that I am awake before I go to bed to deal with and process this potentially devastating news. I can cry all I want and do all the research that I want that night. And then after I go to bed and I feel refreshed the next day, I move on and it’s go time. So here is your challenge should you choose to accept it. Choose one situation that you were facing in your life right now that is challenging your resilience. Now, make a decision to apply your newfound resilience to the situation. Even a small change can make a big difference.

Then I want you to take one small action. It doesn’t matter how small it is, but pay attention to how it feels. Notice what impact your action, no matter how tiny it seems, has on you in the circumstances that you face. And then I want you to rent and repeat. Seriously, do it again, okay? Because that’s all life really is, one experimental action after another, gradually adding up to change and growth. No matter your age, background, experience, or your line of work, you can learn how to improve your resilience so you are ready for any challenge life puts in front of you. Are you willing to give it a try? If you answered yes, then that’s all you need to get started. A willingness to try. If you’re feeling like you need some more inspiration to get you started, then take a line from the resilient Dolly Parton. She said, I never tried quitting, and I never quit trying.

I know that I have unpacked so much on you today from mindset and to resilience and what it can look like and how optimism or positive attitude plays a role in all of it. I am going to leave you with my favorite quote of all time by the late, great Vince Lombardi. Go pack, go. The greatest accomplishment is not never falling, but in rising again after you fall. If you want to take this subject to the next level, I strongly encourage you to join the Life Isn’t Always Easy Facebook group if you want to take this subject to the next level. I strongly encourage you to join the Life Isn’t Always Easy Facebook group where you will find out how to participate in the Embrace the Suck Four Day Course.

If you are struggling to find it, then just go to lifesandwayseasy.com and click on the show notes for the transcript, okay? Or you can go to KimKosteck.com and I have a free resilience e-book with some of what I shared with you today and so much more. And if you’re feeling really ready to take things to the next level, then shoot me a message and we can set up a time to chat about how you can start reaching your goals, goals, and overcoming challenges faster than ever before with one of my coaching programs. I’m willing to bet that as much as life can suck, it always beats the alternative.

From Rags to Clothing Thousands –

Penny Glass, who comes from Detroit, Michigan, experienced challenging circumstances in her upbringing. As a determined mother, she bravely founded “The Clothing Exchange,” a non-profit organization. This initiative enables individuals to swap out clothes that don’t fit or are no longer wanted for gently used ones, fostering a sense of community and mutual support. Despite facing personal challenges, including a battle with cancer and the aftermath of Hurricane Harvey, Penny continues to make a substantial impact by providing clothing to thousands in her community each year. Learn more about The Clothing Exchange at: https://theclothingexchange.info

Summary of the Interview:

The episode of “Life Isn’t Always Easy” features an interview with Penny Glass, the founder and president of the nonprofit organization called the Clothing Exchange. Penny’s story begins in Detroit, Michigan, and leads her to Texas, where she has been putting clothes on thousands of families annually through her organization. Despite facing challenges like Hurricane Harvey and a battle with cancer, Penny remains committed to helping her community.

In the interview, Penny discusses the origin of the Clothing Exchange, starting with her own struggles and the realization of the need for assistance in obtaining school clothes. The organization has grown over the years, providing not only clothes but also backpacks filled with school supplies. Penny shares her personal journey, emphasizing the impact of her experiences on shaping her compassionate and caring nature.

The Clothing Exchange operates by accepting clothing donations, providing vouchers based on the number of items donated, and allowing individuals to “shop” for needed items during designated events. Penny highlights the community’s need for a dedicated building to continue serving efficiently.

Despite personal health challenges, including a battle with colon cancer and long-term effects of COVID-19, Penny remains determined to continue the Clothing Exchange’s mission. She emphasizes the importance of offering hope and support to individuals, helping them feel better about themselves and overcome life’s challenges.

Towards the end of the interview, Penny mentions the Mother’s Day event, her daughter’s achievement in culinary arts, and the continuous support from the community. The conversation showcases Penny’s resilience, selflessness, and dedication to making a positive impact on the lives of others through the Clothing Exchange.

Transcript:

00;00;00;03 – 00;00;35;13
Kim
In this episode of Life Isn’t Always Easy, I interview Penny Glass. Penny is the founder and president of a nonprofit organization called the Clothing Exchange. Penny Story begins literally in rags in Detroit, Michigan, and brings her to Texas. Where she put clothes on thousands of families every single year. I’m telling you, this story is absolutely inspirational. It is full of so much pain, so much grief and so many challenges.

00;00;35;23 – 00;00;47;25
Kim
And every single time that she faced when she turned it around, looked for the opportunity and has changed the lives of thousands in her community.

00;00;53;16 – 00;01;26;06
Kim
This is life isn’t always easy. In fact, it kind of sucks sometimes. The podcast that is all about overcoming the curveballs present. You and I am your host, Ken Kostek, professional organizer Zeigler Legacy Certified Coach specializing in major life changes Hey there and welcome to you. Life isn’t always easy. In fact, it kind of sucks sometimes. I am super excited to present.

00;01;26;08 – 00;01;55;23
Kim
My guest today is Penny Glass. She is a beautiful mother of three girls and founder and president of a local nonprofit organization called the Clothing Exchange. And in the past nine years, they have hosted 18 clothing exchange events that is serving three counties just east of Houston with tens of thousands of articles of clothing that have been distributed during that time.

00;01;56;05 – 00;02;26;29
Kim
And five years ago, they added a back to school drive that is distributed over 2800 backpacks that are filled with school supplies. Penny has a heart of the community and I am so proud to call her a friend for over ten years and in the middle of all of this Penny has also paid some unbelievable challenges like Hurricane Harvey taking away her house and a fight with cancer.

00;02;26;29 – 00;02;52;21
Kim
So I love you, Penny. I am super good. I’m going to cry and see where it’s gotten that you agreed to get in and share your story with me. Pretty emotional. You it’s really hard to believe some of the things that we’ve done and the impact that we’ve had and the challenges that we face while doing it. And I really think about that.

00;02;52;21 – 00;02;54;05
Kim
Do you ever think about what you’ve been through?

00;02;54;25 – 00;03;15;21
Penny
I do, because it makes me who I am today. And I think that if it wouldn’t have been for each and everything that I’ve been through, I wouldn’t be the caring mother, the caring neighbor, the caring person. In the community reaching out and trying to help so many people.

00;03;16;14 – 00;03;41;19
Kim
Thousands of children like when you say 2800 backpacks. Right. That’s what I read. Like when you think of 2800 backpacks, there’s 2800 children, I understand thousands of children that you have made their school year more successful. So tell me, where did this act of service that you have? Where did it come from?

00;03;42;09 – 00;04;05;09
Penny
In order to explain that, let’s go back a little bit further than the cancer, than the hurricane. Let’s go back to age ten with me. Yes. So a long ways back, right? So I grew up poor, OK, so that started before age ten, but starting from age ten to 18, I’m two weeks before my 18th birthday. I was molested by five different people.

00;04;05;20 – 00;04;13;25
Penny
On my 18th birthday, I was raped by two people. And then the day after that I got with a guy that beat the crap out of me for eight months.

00;04;15;26 – 00;04;36;17
Penny
I went through a lot. I went through a lot in a short period of time and in this time of my life. I grew up in Michigan. Let me back up with that too. So I chose to go to Detroit somewhere nobody would think to look at me. And I chose to live in a shelter for four months for when I was lost.

00;04;37;09 – 00;05;00;27
Penny
I felt like there was nobody on my side. I had been through this hurt in this pain and there was nobody there to protect me. And then I go into this shelter and I see this wonderful, amazing father. I wish I could remember his name. And three children that are living in this shelter. There was more there’s different families that impacted me.

00;05;01;09 – 00;05;28;01
Penny
He was in a shelter by choice as well. Getting away from his wife that was addicted to drugs and made it to where they lost everything. I watched the mother that was pregnant eight months going through seizures that they were sitting there saying she was faking and she couldn’t get help. These are just a couple of people that impacted my life, not only in the streets of Detroit, but also in this shelter that I chose to stay in.

00;05;29;12 – 00;05;55;25
Penny
Eventually, I went home and I went in hung out with the wrong crowd. But I tell you what, what changed my life after this happened? I sat on a ground one day and I was going to sit there and slice and I felt something behind me just grabbed me and I dropped the knife, OK, when I was 24 years old, I had yet another surgery on my ovaries.

00;05;56;12 – 00;06;23;07
Penny
And then two months after that, I found out I was pregnant, changed my life because now the purpose the reason I was here in my in my mind, I just wanted to be a good mom. OK, so three kids later. My oldest is now 22, my middle one’s 21 and my youngest a beaming smart alec, 15 year old smart Alec in every way.

00;06;23;07 – 00;06;47;06
Penny
She’s intelligent. She’s got the smart alec from her mom. But to get to that point, this is where we are today. So before my middle, my I’m sorry, my oldest daughter started her sixth grade year. They thought she had a tumor. And we spent four months robbing Peter to pay Paul to pay her medical bills. There was no help for us because me and her dad worked.

00;06;47;09 – 00;07;08;16
Penny
Our income was over the income barriers, so we didn’t have a way to get them school clothes or shoes or backpacks and school supplies that year. And my mom stepped in. But that’s when my argument with God started OK, I’m sorry. I now have faith with God’s help. So when I moved to Texas, that’s where I am now.

00;07;08;23 – 00;07;33;04
Penny
I found an awesome church and I became a family of this church and I found out who God was. And I found that everything that he put me through made me the mom that He was preparing me to be. So I was at this church. It was called Eagle Heights Fellowship. Amazing family. I miss them all. I started arguing with God.

00;07;33;12 – 00;07;51;02
Penny
I argued with God for over a year before I went to the pastor of the Eagle Heights Fellowship. And I said, Pastor, I have this idea I said, I’ve been arguing with God about this for over a year. I said, I’m tired of this argument. And I told him what was going on. And he said, Try it if it works.

00;07;51;07 – 00;08;16;13
Penny
Keep going. The very first one, we helped 30 people. That was it. The August before COVID, we helped 1500 August is always our biggest one. That’s our back to school. We do backpacks, we do food. Last year we gave out socks and underwear brand new. We gave out the backpacks and school supplies. Everybody got a box of food, a box of hurricane supplies, you name it.

00;08;16;13 – 00;08;46;00
Penny
It’s a great big event. In August, COVID slowed us down a little bit, but we still helped 1500 people last year as well. So our numbers are staying at 1500. But what we’re finding now is we need a building. The need is in the community for a building, and that’s where we are with that. And I skipped right over Harvey in cancer because I get so excited talking about the clothing exchange that I forget about everything else.

00;08;46;00 – 00;08;48;07
Penny
I’m so sorry. No, no, it’s OK.

00;08;48;07 – 00;09;21;22
Kim
It’s OK. So, so let me help and then you just kind of add in a little bit more to anybody that is unfamiliar with the clothing exchanges. So, you know, I did talk about, you know, that y’all distribute urban, you know, thousands of articles of clothing. I’m just going to kind of adlib. And then I want you to give like the official clothing exchange description because one of the things about this ministry is and I hope somebody that is listening to this gets inspired and wants to do you want in their community and gets with you and how to be able to do this?

00;09;21;22 – 00;09;47;00
Kim
Because this is something that needs to happen nationwide, to be quite honest with you. OK, so the clothing exchange essentially when I explain it to my clients because because I have clients, as you know, that have them donated to y’all quite frequently every year it is you give up your clothes like clothes that you’re going to be donating or anyways maybe to Goodwill or that you no longer fit.

00;09;47;00 – 00;10;10;22
Kim
Right. You know, children that can no longer fit into their clothes because they grow. Count those items, including purses, belts, shoes, what have you. And then they give you a voucher there’s a collection process of several days where they’re sorting through and they’re setting up for the exchange and they give you a voucher. And then with this voucher, you go back shopping on that Saturday.

00;10;10;22 – 00;10;34;24
Kim
That’s a big fun event shop for the amount of items that were on the voucher that you donated. And it doesn’t have. It’s not like a same exchange or anything like that if you’re just wanting to purge out your closet, but you don’t need any more clothes, then you can essentially use that voucher to get clothes, beds for a niece or nephew.

00;10;34;24 – 00;10;49;17
Kim
The idea, like you said with your daughter that you need needed school clothes and somebody else could use those clothes and then somebody may have a size that you need. Did did I give the clothing exchange enough justice with my explanation of it?

00;10;50;07 – 00;11;07;09
Penny
Absolutely. Absolutely. I tell everybody when I stop them because we go to different we go to farmer’s markets and different things. And I get the pleasure of talking about it. And I always tell them I can give them a little spiel in 30 seconds or less. So, you know, you did good, but let me do it. My version. How’s that.

00;11;07;16 – 00;11;08;20
Kim
That’s what I’m basically.

00;11;08;20 – 00;11;35;18
Penny
All you do is you go through your closets, anything you can’t bitty, you don’t wear, you bring it to us. We have four days, a drop out Monday through Thursday. Thursday the next one is August, first through fourth. You we give you a voucher for how many pieces you bring. You come back on Saturday and you bring your voucher and you can get at least that many pieces however, since we started this, we have been blessed enough to be able to tell the families, don’t even worry about that voucher.

00;11;35;18 – 00;11;54;03
Penny
We don’t count their clothes when they leave. We do when they come in because of bookkeeping purposes. But when they leave, we tell them or when they get there. I have this little meeting before we open the doors and I am honored to tell them that they don’t have to worry about the number on their voucher, get what their family needs.

00;11;55;07 – 00;11;57;26
Penny
Wow. Absolutely.

00;11;58;07 – 00;12;31;05
Kim
That that is amazing in and you’re right there. I remember a clothing exchange, I guess it was last year were there were socks, there were even feminine hygiene products and things that were donated. And the Houston Food Bank has came out and really supported this initiative. And and again, this is something that should be in every community if if you asked me so tell me, what did it cost you to start this?

00;12;32;19 – 00;12;56;16
Penny
It actually cost me absolutely nothing. We were able to get so our first clothes racks were made by two by fours. We still have them. And I think my dad had it as extra wood at his house because he had already went through two hurricanes, so they had extra wood from theirs. So they made us these makeshift clothes racks we still have those.

00;12;57;04 – 00;13;00;29
Penny
And basically it didn’t cost us anything but our time.

00;13;01;24 – 00;13;09;03
Kim
Which is a lot of time. And I’m about to get to that in a second. Y’all are 501 C three organization.

00;13;09;24 – 00;13;10;04
Penny
Yeah.

00;13;10;18 – 00;13;15;05
Kim
You love giving out volunteer hours to students.

00;13;15;28 – 00;13;17;04
Penny
Absolutely.

00;13;18;07 – 00;13;20;12
Penny
At work. Yes, absolutely.

00;13;20;12 – 00;13;32;02
Kim
They absolutely do. Because you do you hold them accountable. And I get that and I agree to that. And but it is a and you’ll have a board of directors, correct?

00;13;32;02 – 00;13;32;24
Speaker 3
Absolutely.

00;13;32;24 – 00;13;33;04
Penny
Yes.

00;13;33;04 – 00;13;41;09
Kim
He retired with the 501c3. So how many regular volunteers would you say that you have to date?

00;13;41;21 – 00;13;44;26
Penny
I would say maybe 15

00;13;45;17 – 00;13;50;21
Kim
OK. And how many more do you think that you need? 150.

00;13;52;27 – 00;14;23;22
Penny
Well, this is where it gets hard for the event itself, rather that when we accept clothes that Monday through Thursday, for one, we never know how many people we’re going to get on the days. So we have people accepting the clothes, people going through the clothes, people taking them and sorting them. How many more could we use? I honestly could say we could use a good 20 a day, if not more, to make it easier for everybody.

00;14;23;22 – 00;14;36;07
Penny
Because what happens is that variety that we don’t take clothes, we’re just trying to get everything done, we’re exhausted and we just want to make sure it’s right for everybody.

00;14;36;23 – 00;14;59;14
Kim
It is organized for, you know, toddler boys, toddler girls, baby boys, baby girls, you know, in your girls, junior boys or I guess it would be whatever. And then adults and then all sizes plus sizes, I mean, and then dresses formal wear is is separate y’all. And it’s pretty organized and I have to give you that. OK.

00;14;59;29 – 00;15;01;09
Speaker 3
So we’re going to go back to the time.

00;15;02;13 – 00;15;28;26
Kim
The time invested into this I know that is hours and hours and not just during the event, but in the middle. And and you do multiple fundraisers now between in between actual clothing exchanges. And like you said, there’s one in the fall and then there’s always one that’s hosted over spring break as well. No spring break vacations for Penny.

00;15;29;07 – 00;15;32;19
Penny
But vacation. What’s that?

00;15;32;24 – 00;16;02;14
Kim
I know, right? I know in that idea, you know, all the time that you invest in between as well and time it comes with an exchange. And one of those things that you really had to fight with was your house and your house while continuing to grow the clothing exchange you’ve been through, still going through a battle. Talk to me about that.

00;16;03;08 – 00;16;05;00
Speaker 3
How when what was it like?

00;16;05;22 – 00;16;14;05
Penny
Let’s start back with I think the first thing you mentioned was the hurricane and I want to say it was 20, 18. I could be wrong.

00;16;14;05 – 00;16;16;04
Speaker 3
I know it’s 2017.

00;16;17;26 – 00;16;22;27
Kim
Before I had my son. I will never forget when Hurricane Harvey was.

00;16;23;13 – 00;16;58;29
Penny
I will tell you, I will never forget the day we evacuated because it was the day before Johannesburg, which is my youngest. I just could never remember the year, which is horrible. Now we know she was 11. She turned 11 the day after so we got four foot of water in our house for Harvey everything I’m going to say, probably 99% of everything we owned got flooded after just remodeling my kitchen dining room, living room, and my daughter’s bathroom from a kitchen fire.

00;16;59;13 – 00;16;59;21
Penny
Yeah.

00;16;59;21 – 00;17;03;28
Kim
I’m going to pause there real quick and say, as a single mom.

00;17;05;04 – 00;17;27;03
Penny
Yes, as a single mom. So me and my kids remodeled the house with the help of my parents because I don’t do electricity just got the house back together, brand new furniture and everything but my room. Here comes Harvey, four foot of water. So it wipes us out yeah. I didn’t even know I had so much stuff in my house.

00;17;27;03 – 00;17;48;07
Penny
But I’m going to tell you, there was one box in my garage. I had tote boxes because I’m a crafter and I crochet, and that’s a whole nother silly story. But out of all that whole boxes that were in my garage, one tool box did not have any water in it, was not damaged in any way, shape or form.

00;17;49;03 – 00;17;51;16
Penny
And that was my clothing exchange box.

00;17;52;06 – 00;17;52;20
Kim
Wow.

00;17;53;10 – 00;18;14;01
Penny
Yeah, that was pretty crazy for foot of water. And that tote was actually on the floor by itself. So there is no telling where it was. We got the house back together. I was working on it. Me and the girls put in flooring. We had horrible contractors. I was able to get all of the house back together except for my bedroom.

00;18;14;17 – 00;18;46;18
Penny
I still had boards hanging from the ceiling, drywall missing from the ceiling. It was a horrible experience. I just figured I would get to it eventually. And then in 2019, probably we started noticing things were going on with me and probably July or August, my stomach was hurting I just didn’t understand, like I would eat and it would just feel like I don’t even know how to explain it.

00;18;47;04 – 00;19;12;09
Penny
Like I constantly had to go to the restroom and it made it it just got harder and harder to eat. We were going to the hospitals. My daughter drove me to Texas Women’s Hospital. They were doing tests and nothing was coming back. Finally, in April of 20, 20, I went to the hospital right after COVID started I spent three days there.

00;19;12;09 – 00;19;40;21
Penny
They couldn’t do any testing because that’s when the government shut down all elective testing because apparently a colonoscopy was elective. They found that I had a severe severe colitis and a severe UTI sent me home with medicine. Three days later, I’m back at the hospital. I can’t even keep water down by this time. I’m in they admit me again.

00;19;40;21 – 00;20;03;01
Penny
Get in the hospital room. The doctor comes in the room and says, Miss Glass, I’m sorry I told you three days ago, there’s nothing we can do for you. The government has testing closed or shut down. There was a nurse in the room, and to this day, we even got her a gift and everything because she looked at that doctor and said, Doctor, they started opening testing back up yesterday.

00;20;05;06 – 00;20;13;28
Penny
Two days later, I found out I had stage two be colon cancer. It had blocked everything from exiting, and that’s why I was getting sick.

00;20;15;28 – 00;20;40;07
Penny
And we now found out the reason they were having problems finding out what was going on is because my markers were never out. If anybody doesn’t know what that means, there’s markers in your blood that tells them by the elevations or decreasing. If you have cancer and my never were out. That’s now something that they have to be more aware of as well.

00;20;41;08 – 00;20;46;17
Kim
So we find out in 20, 20 in the height of a pandemic.

00;20;48;21 – 00;20;49;04
Speaker 3
We’ve got.

00;20;49;04 – 00;20;58;00
Kim
Colon cancer still over the summer yet you still host a clothing exchange a few months later.

00;20;59;06 – 00;21;35;02
Penny
Absolutely. Why because the help is still needed. Just because I’m sick doesn’t mean other people don’t need that Ray of hope. My biggest thing is I was bullied because I was poor and didn’t have, you know, the clothes. If we can help somebody just feel better about themselves, get that better job, go to school and not get bullied because they look nice, or just give them that little bit of hope they need just to be themselves.

00;21;35;29 – 00;21;53;18
Penny
That’s what matters to me. And just because I’m sick doesn’t mean that stops because there’s too many people that rely on what we do. We get a lot of foster families, too, that come in. That’s how they clothed their kids. They look forward to this interaction munity.

00;21;54;26 – 00;22;00;08
Kim
Yeah, mean do. And you’ve made me cry in No Crying Aloud.

00;22;01;02 – 00;22;35;05
Penny
You open that door in October of 2020. I then got COVID for the first time in January of 2021. I got COVID for the second time, got the vaccine in March because I was more scared of not getting covered again. Now I suffer long term COVID and my bones and muscles hurt really horribly every single day from the time I open my eyes in the morning to the time I go to bed at night.

00;22;35;28 – 00;22;38;09
Kim
And on top of that, what’s the status of the cancer?

00;22;39;13 – 00;22;43;04
Penny
Cancer, Bri, as of April 13th, of this year.

00;22;43;21 – 00;22;45;05
Kim
That is amazing.

00;22;47;06 – 00;23;23;13
Kim
This bit scary. You know, I mean, hearing those words that you don’t know what that’s going to mean. I got off the phone and I remember thinking I wish she would have just told me it was cancer because that was familiar. And you’re either going to beat it or you’re not. I understand that that that was an emotional state of mind that I was in in that moment when you just find out that your child has a chronic illness.

00;23;23;13 – 00;24;04;07
Kim
I still would never wish that diagnosis on anybody. And it’s and it’s scary. And I was in a very similar situation with Lincoln during COVID, with the procedures getting shut down, what they call elective that weren’t very elective. They’re making elective and, you know, labeling elective and and which is then hindering, you know, treatment, which was just just making it last longer for you.

00;24;04;13 – 00;24;37;03
Kim
And that’s hard and then to, you know, to have these other situations as a result of COVID. But to see you still pushing forward, I mean, nothing is going to stop you. Nothing is going to slow you down. I’m dead convinced of that, that you were just absolutely invincible when we were at the Mothers Day event, that the the clothing chain hosted a fundraiser.

00;24;37;10 – 00;24;42;04
Kim
I’m hoping it was financially successful for you.

00;24;43;02 – 00;24;48;13
Penny
The first one, it was good it will grow each year. We all know how that works.

00;24;48;24 – 00;24;55;11
Kim
Yes, absolutely. But I remain for not just myself, but other people saying, hey, sit down.

00;24;55;28 – 00;24;57;27
Speaker 3
Be sit down.

00;24;58;08 – 00;25;20;04
Kim
Stop. And not only are you hosting a Mother’s Day event with vendors and food as a fundraiser for the clothing exchange, but your daughter walks across a college stage to be able to get a certificate in culinary arts, which is super cool.

00;25;21;06 – 00;25;23;28
Penny
First level one certification.

00;25;24;07 – 00;25;26;03
Speaker 3
Whatever. OK.

00;25;27;21 – 00;25;29;24
Penny
I don’t know either. To be honest, I am here.

00;25;30;09 – 00;25;31;00
Speaker 3
You see, got.

00;25;31;01 – 00;25;32;07
Kim
Certification.

00;25;32;07 – 00;25;32;14
Speaker 3
In.

00;25;32;14 – 00;26;01;05
Kim
Culinary arts, and when she hasn’t even finished her sophomore year of high school yet, and then you come back to the clothing exchange after having been there since like at 6:00 in the morning I think you said, and they come back to make sure that you close down the event all the while your body is hurting. This just kind of brings me to why I created this platform.

00;26;01;08 – 00;26;03;29
Kim
Your life isn’t easy. It’s had a lot of.

00;26;03;29 – 00;26;04;17
Speaker 3
Suck.

00;26;06;26 – 00;26;07;29
Penny
It surely has.

00;26;08;21 – 00;26;15;16
Kim
And but you’re smiling and you are happy.

00;26;16;11 – 00;26;17;12
Speaker 3
And.

00;26;17;27 – 00;26;19;12
Kim
It radiates from.

00;26;19;12 – 00;26;21;08
Speaker 3
You and.

00;26;21;23 – 00;26;24;24
Kim
You have changed the lives of.

00;26;25;07 – 00;26;28;08
Speaker 3
The thousands of.

00;26;28;08 – 00;26;29;15
Kim
Families.

00;26;30;13 – 00;26;37;15
Speaker 3
I know you’re kind of a rock star now.

00;26;38;03 – 00;27;04;10
Penny
I’m just a normal every day I’ve been through some crap because it does suck. But if I can help alleviate one other person’s life sucking with just a pair of pants or a pair of shoes that fit, or maybe they lost weight or they gained weight and they don’t have anything that fits because, golly, we know about weight loss and weight gain.

00;27;04;10 – 00;27;32;10
Penny
That’s for sure. But sometimes just the right thing that fits your body can change the way you feel about yourself, and that will change the way you go into a job. That way, you go into a classroom the way your whole outlook on life is and not only that, I hope that I get time to talk to them and tell my story because it doesn’t define me.

00;27;33;14 – 00;27;58;10
Penny
I am proud to share my story because it makes me who I am, but I want to continue to uplift people why does it have to be about hatred and anger all the time? I don’t understand. And even my board knows it’s about respect it doesn’t matter who comes through that door. I don’t care if they come in with no clothes on.

00;27;58;10 – 00;28;06;28
Penny
They get the same respect as the last person, and that’s the way it should be. No matter what in my in my little brain of a world.

00;28;08;05 – 00;28;13;21
Kim
Well, I mean, here your brain is kind of created something pretty freaking awesome.

00;28;13;21 – 00;28;15;25
Speaker 3
That we got to say about that.

00;28;16;05 – 00;28;19;11
Kim
So you get a little bit of the say so with that board more.

00;28;19;11 – 00;28;21;01
Penny
So I’m just saying.

00;28;21;01 – 00;28;42;21
Kim
That and that’s my two sense. Not that it matters. So tell me. I’m only going to assume that if somebody said I want to create a clothing exchange in my community, I’m going to go out on a limb and say that you would be willing to have those conversations with them.

00;28;43;12 – 00;28;43;27
Speaker 3
And I.

00;28;43;27 – 00;28;45;16
Kim
Want you be able.

00;28;45;18 – 00;28;49;03
Penny
To where they are to help them with their very first one.

00;28;50;00 – 00;29;24;02
Kim
That that is beautiful. I hope that that happens. I really do. So one last question on the clothing exchange. With that being said, because again, I’m hoping that we have inspired somebody to do this for their community what is the number one mistake that you made or an error or the biggest challenge that you had that if you knew, because hindsight’s always 2020, right.

00;29;24;02 – 00;29;26;02
Kim
That you could have avoided.

00;29;27;28 – 00;29;53;05
Penny
Probably document better. I don’t actually have plans for what I do. I kind of go with where God leads me every day. And that sounds kind of crazy. But that’s really how it is. I don’t have a plan. I wake up every day like all this stuff’s going through my mind and then I get a phone call. Like this morning I got a phone call from somebody in there said, I got your number from another nonprofit.

00;29;53;13 – 00;30;00;23
Penny
I hear you’re having a garage sale coming up at 20% garage sale and I have a whole houseful that I want to donate to you.

00;30;04;05 – 00;30;04;15
Kim
So do you.

00;30;04;15 – 00;30;05;02
Speaker 3
Say. Yes.

00;30;05;24 – 00;30;15;23
Penny
Absolutely. But my biggest thing is volunteers then, because we got to move this stuff. Yes. Yes. Ma’am, I did. Yes, ma’am. I said we will do it.

00;30;16;22 – 00;30;23;16
Kim
I’m pretty sure I’ve actually made a very similar call to you before with a client that has had an estate sale.

00;30;24;13 – 00;30;25;02
Speaker 3
They said.

00;30;25;11 – 00;30;27;10
Kim
Come make the clothing exchange, get what they.

00;30;27;10 – 00;30;30;16
Penny
Want real quick. Let me talk about that. So we.

00;30;30;17 – 00;30;31;15
Kim
Do to use Houston.

00;30;31;24 – 00;31;09;06
Penny
Garage sale, we sell everything but the furniture for $0.25. It doesn’t matter what it is. It’s not clothes because we save the clothes for the clothing exchange. They don’t get there’s no cost for clothes, period. We sell everything for a quarter. Every money that all the money we make goes for only backpacks and school supplies. That’s it. But again, I want it back up to because there’s no way I would even be able to do these nine years without the support of my board, without the support of my friends like you as well, without the support of my parents, because we’re all volunteers.

00;31;09;17 – 00;31;14;26
Penny
We don’t if we don’t have enough, we come out of our pockets somehow and make it happen.

00;31;15;25 – 00;31;17;18
Speaker 3
So it.

00;31;17;18 – 00;31;24;20
Penny
Does. And without everybody, this would never my little plan nine years ago would have never been where it is today.

00;31;26;00 – 00;31;33;11
Kim
So it’s you’re also saying is the clothing exchange means some type of business planner.

00;31;34;16 – 00;31;36;29
Speaker 3
Yes. Know. And we need that.

00;31;36;29 – 00;31;39;17
Penny
Website to from that business planner.

00;31;40;05 – 00;31;42;21
Speaker 3
Oh, OK. OK.

00;31;44;05 – 00;31;53;22
Penny
Hey, you know what? It’s baby steps. We’re talking about these old people trying to do everything these five year olds can do. And we have no idea.

00;31;54;16 – 00;32;06;01
Kim
But this I will come in to you right now. We talked about it. We played the idea around I will commit to you with the website by the end of the week.

00;32;07;28 – 00;32;08;26
Speaker 3
OK, you got it.

00;32;10;20 – 00;32;14;03
Kim
I know, right? And this is how Penny does it, ladies and gentlemen.

00;32;15;20 – 00;32;17;20
Speaker 3
That like boring people.

00;32;18;17 – 00;32;57;16
Kim
I know because if you missed that whole, like, look that she gave me, I knew where she was going with that. OK, so committed, done. The year is you deserve it. And thank you. I know that. I mean, even though myself and my family tried to give our donations and my business gives donations and my children give their time, especially to rack up those volunteer hours I mean, honestly, they were doing it without before we they were doing it long before they were in high school and volunteer hours actually counted.

00;32;57;16 – 00;33;23;26
Kim
So it doesn’t it doesn’t matter. You want to donate to the clothing exchange? When we put out the show notes for this interview, I will make sure that we have a link to their website and a link to how to donate online. And I’m going to put me on blast with her information on how to get a hold of her.

00;33;24;05 – 00;33;37;10
Kim
So you can create a clothing exchange in your community because she is committed to going rapper. It is helping you through your first one. And let’s let’s grow this. You know.

00;33;38;16 – 00;33;39;15
Penny
Absolutely.

00;33;40;15 – 00;33;58;11
Kim
You know, Penny, you inspire me in so many and I truly believe that you have never received the recognition that you deserve, but your humility would stand in the way of it anyways.

00;33;58;24 – 00;34;01;15
Speaker 3
So you are somebody that.

00;34;01;17 – 00;34;02;28
Kim
I recognize you.

00;34;04;04 – 00;34;23;22
Penny
Never want. I do this for recognition. I’m one of those that likes to sit in the silence. And it takes a lot for me to do that speech, you know, twice a year before we open the doors. It really does. I’m shaking and everything I’ve even like in our prayer, I’ll be going. It’s good. And then all of a sudden I forget everything and I have to end it.

00;34;23;28 – 00;34;38;00
Penny
So, you know, I am one of those that I like to be in the background, but I’m going to get it done. And again, I couldn’t be able to do this without anybody else either. I certainly can’t be this one person nope.

00;34;38;00 – 00;35;06;03
Kim
Nope. You you can’t. You can’t. Well, is there anything else that you would like to add for someone for any money that’s either facing a challenge or somebody that, you know, has gone giving them this plan in their head and talking to them, even if it’s something completely different or just I mean, any money out there, is there any other message that you want to give.

00;35;07;09 – 00;35;34;29
Penny
There’s one thing that I’ve been very strict. Like, I coached soccer for ten years. I have my own children. Of course, there’s one thing that, again, no matter what you’ve been through or what, don’t let people hold your back. Hold you back as long as you believe in yourself, you can do anything. And that’s my biggest thing. Don’t let people take that away because you’re the one who determines your future.

00;35;35;17 – 00;35;48;15
Penny
And I may not be the best of anything, but I’m not letting anybody else hold me back any more either. That’s not going to happen. I believe in myself way too much.

00;35;50;20 – 00;35;56;19
Kim
That’s all right. And you have every reason not to believe in yourself. But you chose to anyways.

00;35;57;24 – 00;35;58;21
Penny
Absolutely.

00;35;59;02 – 00;36;14;29
Kim
Already. My dear. Well, I thank you. I cannot thank you enough. I hope that you I mean, I know that you have inspired many and you will continue to do so. And I hope that somebody actually takes you up on your offer.

00;36;15;12 – 00;36;18;18
Penny
I hope so too. That would be great. That would be great.

00;36;18;25 – 00;36;40;28
Kim
Thank you for listening to Life isn’t always easy. In fact, it kind of sucks sometimes. I would love to connect with you and receive your feedback. You can do so by going to Life isn’t always easy dot com. There you will find every way for us to connect and links to the show notes and transcript of this episode.

00;36;41;03 – 00;36;45;22
Kim
Wherever it is in your life, just know that you matter and keep.

The Diagnosis that changed EVERYTHING –

This is the (cliffs notes) story of that pivotal moment in my life that changed everything for me… it was the beginning of a new chapter in my life that I was convinced would never be anything but me feeling lost and hopeless. Turns out, it was the best thing that could have ever happened for myself, my children and my future. 

Episode Summary:
In this episode, host Kim Kosteck shares the profound journey of navigating her daughter Korina’s diagnosis of eosinophilic esophagitis (EOE). From the initial shock of the diagnosis to the challenges of extreme food restrictions, Kim opens up about her struggles in an abusive marriage and the transformative decision to opt for a gastronomy tube. The episode explores the complexities of managing EOE, the creative adaptations to food restrictions, and the unexpected opportunities that arose from adversity. Kim reflects on the impact on her family, the power of connection with others facing similar challenges, and the gratitude for the positive outcomes that emerged along the way.

Key Takeaways:

1. Facing Adversity: The episode delves into the emotional journey of facing a challenging medical diagnosis and the initial struggles to comprehend its impact.
2. Unfiltered Reflection: Kim shares a vulnerable moment of wishing for a different diagnosis, offering a raw and unfiltered perspective on the complexities of the situation.
3. Navigating Extreme Restrictions: Listeners gain insights into the daily challenges of managing extreme food restrictions, creative alternatives, and the evolving landscape of available options.
4. Transformation through Struggles: The episode highlights the transformative decision to end an abusive marriage and the positive impact it had on Korina’s health.
5. Gastronomy Tube Journey: Kim discusses the controversial decision to opt for a gastronomy tube, detailing the positive transformation in Korina’s life post-tube placement.
6. Finding Strength: The narrative emphasizes finding strength and opportunities in unexpected places, encouraging listeners facing challenges to persevere.
7. Connecting with Others: Kim explores the ripple effect of sharing Korina’s journey, connecting with other families facing similar diagnoses, and the power of a supportive community.
8. Gratitude and Reflection: The episode concludes with gratitude for the transformative journey, reflection on unexpected opportunities, and an invitation for listeners to connect with the host.

Transcript:

Have you ever had a seemingly normal day and then all of a sudden you get news that just feels like a punch in the gut? Well, that is what we are going to be talking about today in this episode of Life. Life isn’t always easy.

I’d like to offer an improved version of the podcast transcript:

The narrative unfolds not eight years ago in 2014, as one might think, but well before then. However, February 13, 2014, stands out as a crucial turning point in my life. It marks the day when my daughter’s doctor, with an intricately thick Turkish accent that challenged even face-to-face comprehension, called to deliver a diagnosis that would reshape my reality. The words “Are you sitting down?” preceded the revelation of the biopsy results from her endoscopy, unveiling a chronic disorder known as eosinophilic esophagitis.

Back then, those medical terms were as foreign to me as a language I’d never heard. I asked the doctor to slow down, carefully spelling out the condition so I could write it down. As he explained the implications, memories flooded in of a young friend of my oldest daughter, living in Philadelphia years ago, who faced a similar ordeal. The regimen of elimination diets, food trials, and endoscopies seemed daunting, recalling the strain it put on both the child and his family.

My immediate call was to that friend, now residing in Maryland, seeking insight into what lay ahead. Hearing the same words from her as the doctor had spoken to me, I couldn’t contain my emotions. Eosinophilic esophagitis meant my daughter would have to relinquish all her favorite foods, a heartbreaking prospect for any parent. In that moment, I found myself grappling with the realization that, as difficult as it sounds, I wished he had told me my child had cancer.

Not that I desired cancer for my kid, but the prospect of either overcoming it or succumbing to it seemed more straightforward than a life-altering condition affecting every meal, every day. Food, omnipresent in our lives—parties, commercials, three meals a day plus snacks—was now laden with restrictions: wheat, soy, egg, and the existing dairy-free regimen. It felt like a monumental challenge for both her and us.

What is eosinophilic esophagitis, or EOE? It’s an immune response to food passing through the esophagus, triggering white blood cells called eosinophils. Yet, by the time they reach the esophagus, the food has already moved on, leading these cells to attack the esophagus itself. Each meal, even supposedly safe ones, became a painful experience for my daughter.

Fast forward, we believed we had the disease under control, only to discover the need for drastic measures—eliminating foods, using swallow steroids, and undergoing additional endoscopies. Attempts to reintroduce certain foods backfired, leading to a bewildering cycle of elimination, patch testing, and allergy identification.

Throughout this challenging journey, I was ensnared in a miserable, abusive marriage. The lack of support for my daughter’s condition further strained our relationship. Finally summoning the strength, I ended the marriage, a decision long overdue. At the peak of my daughter’s food restrictions, she avoided wheat, soy, dairy, egg, tree nuts, peanuts, poultry, red and blue dye, natural and artificial flavorings, corn, rice, and potato. The list might sound overwhelming, but we navigated it, discovering creative alternatives for even the most basic items.

People often express disbelief at how we managed, but the truth is, I never allowed myself another choice. There was no alternative; I was determined to ensure my daughter lived as full a life as possible, despite the challenging road ahead. Although she grew progressively sicker, I clung to the belief that we could find solutions and navigate through the hardships as a team.

Amid Karina’s worsening condition, I made controversial decisions, including opting for a gastronomy tube, akin to a port directly into the stomach. This allowed her to receive essential nutrition through a formula designed for children with food allergies. Despite its repulsive taste and smell, it became a lifeline for Karina, enabling her to grow and thrive.

Placing the tube marked a turning point. Karina, once confined to a wheelchair and unable to attend a full day of school, transformed into a varsity cheerleader as a high school sophomore. Her journey, followed by thousands, connected us with families facing similar diagnoses. Despite the unimaginable challenges, we emerged living our best lives.

Reflecting on that pivotal phone call from the doctor, I find myself grateful. While I would never wish this on any family, the experience shaped us, bringing us closer, prompting the long-overdue divorce, and opening unexpected opportunities. In the midst of challenges, a different perspective can reveal hidden opportunities. No matter what you’re going through, remember, you’re not alone. Embrace challenges, confront them head-on, and you’ll emerge stronger and, perhaps, even grateful.

Thank you for joining me on “Life Isn’t Always Easy.” I’m your host, Kim Kosteck. Connect with me on social media, explore my free challenges at lifeisntalwayseasy.com, and don’t forget to leave a rating, review, and subscribe to stay updated on new episodes.

Intro –

This overview episode really lays out the framework of what to expect from this podcast. From chronic illness, parenting (fails), divorce, trauma, controversial issues and overcoming adversity…. We are going to talk about some pretty ugly parts of life with ZERO judgement.

Transcript

This life isn’t always easy. In fact, it kind of sucks sometimes. The podcast that is all about overcoming the curveball fighter vet you. And I am your host, Kim Kosteck, professional organizer, Ziglar Legacy certified coach, specializing in major life changes.

Hey there and welcome. I am super excited to have you here with me and on this journey together. So this episode is just a summary and kind of an introduction of what to expect in future episodes from life isn’t always easy. In fact, it kind of sucks sometimes. So I want to make sure that you, as the listeners are listening with an open heart and an open mind.

And even though you may hear some things that you don’t necessarily agree with, it is not our place to judge anybody else in what it is that they decided to do in that moment or in that situation or even what they decided to do after the fact. This is truly an opportunity for us to learn from experiences and even mistakes.

Some of the subjects that we are going to cover have to do with chronic illness and rare illness, which is what really got me to where I am initially. But we’re also going to talk about parenting and parenting, fails, divorce, trauma, super controversial issues that may arise in the world that we live in. We’re also going to discuss public service. And again, we’re going to do each of these without judgment and disagreeing with whether it’s myself or one of my guests. It’s okay. And just to disagree in general, it’s healthy. As long as we do it with an open mind and an open heart, then it gives us an opportunity to understand others and their perspectives. And just because you validate what someone is feeling or experienced, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you agree with them. And that’s how change is truly made is just going against the grain and maybe disagreeing with someone, standing firm to your values and seeing where it takes you.

So some of the people that I am going to be interviewing and having his guests on this show are those that have changed the world, some in larger ways than others. But that’s okay. The world that we face is full of adversity and these absolutely amazing guests that I have changed their story or what the world should say that their story would look like. Because in the end, this world gave them two potential options. They could either fall to what happened to them or they could make it the beginning of a beautiful news story. I am super excited about this and to share these amazing people that I have encountered through my experiences with you. And I just really hope that you are able to grow and I cannot wait to watch this relationship evolve.

Thank you for listening to life isn’t always easy. In fact, it kind of sucks sometimes. I am your host, Kim Kosteck. I would like to invite each of you to connect with me on social media or sign up for one of my free challenges of the month@lifeesentowayseasy.com and please don’t forget to leave me a rating and review and subscribe to this podcast so you will know every time episodes are released.